Lately it seems like people are becoming more and more hostile. During the last month I have personally been screamed at and flipped off by strangers more times than the rest of my life combined. I find myself wondering if a small dose of the rage virus has been slipped into the water supply of central Ohio. It starts out with people being horrible to complete strangers for no reason and pretty soon we are going to be overrun with zombies!
So here are some Ninja Monkey tips for preventing rage infection:
-Stop and think before you scream at someone, if you do not master your rage then your rage will be your master. The terribly mysterious Sphinx gave me that advice.
-Take a deep breath and realize that you are most likely angry at something else and not the current situation. Maybe work is not going so great, or you lost your dog or your favorite team is not preforming or your grandma was turned into a zombie. All of these things are unfortunate but they do not give you license to be a jerk.
-Find more useful things to do with your middle finger. You could use it to greet people like Mork from Ork, or throw a peace sign or even to put on a neighborhood shadow puppet show.
If you encounter someone who is acting crazy and trying to make you as angry as they are, just ignore it and keep a close eye on them. If they turn there is only one solution....
ZOMBIE DANCE SEQUENCE!!!!
C'mon people now smile on your brother everybody get together try to love one another right now!
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